Fish Vigil

Keeping a watchful eye on Dave the fish.

He is not looking so good. I was telling Dave (my husband) that Dave wasn't looking too good. Well, what do you want to do, take him to the vet? Can we?

I guess not.

We will have to see how he does tonight.

It has been quite a day around here.

We had court this morning with Dave's ex-wife Michelle. It is always difficult to see her and her husband and spend the day in court presenting your personal business to a court for them to decide what you are going to do instead of being able to handle it personally. I feel it is such an enormous waste of time and energy.

Following that we spent some time on a community service project I am working on that hit a huge roadblock today. I will be able to get through it, but it will require much more work than anticipated and I am running out of time.

I then returned home at 7:30 this evening after leaving this morning at 5:30 to two weddings in crisis.

Now Dave.

It all leaves me feeling very tired.

Yet not too tired to focus on how thankful I am and to trust in Him.

Last night Dave and I prayed about court today. We told Him we knew He knew how today was going to turn out, that we are fully aware that He already knew the outcome and whatever that would be, we would accept it. We just wanted to talk to him about us being with Michelle and Bill in court with peace in our hearts, gentleness in our word and grace. Things that we typically find very difficult to present in her presence.

I know I always struggle with peace, gentleness and grace when I need it the most, and my experience has been, when Dave and I are in the presence of Michelle, it is a time I need it the most and struggle the hardest. Today was different. Dave and I were both at peace and very calm. We were pleasant in a very unpleasant situation and are both very thankful that our prayers of peace, gentleness and grace were answered and how our experience was so much better for it.

Now I must remain the same with everything else that is going on. None of the circumstances of the day are within my control. I must sit back with peace in knowing that He is in control and watch His will play out.

I will continue my fish vigil and also my vigil of all the other things going on in my life right now. Knowing I have done all I can do and if enlightened with more, will do more, while trusting Him and His plan and accepting that, whatever it may be.